Well, it happened. Saturday I debuted this year’s ‘Ween labour of love: a Toddler in a Tiara. Because nothing is scarier than a sexualized 3 year old, amiright?
The winner of the “Guess What I am Goin’ As” contest is Claire Q. Please send me an email and let me know what Victory Pattern you would like!
This costume was shockingly fun to make. I did a ton of research on pageant dresses. As anyone who has seen the TLC show “Toddlers in Tiaras” knows, the Glitz pageants are the creepiest. Little girls are spray tanned, fitted with fake “perfect” teeth, hopped up on energy drinks and then sent on stage to pantomime being a beautiful, sexy little princess. It’s horrifying. Perfect for Halloween!
Using a stretch knit I modified Vogue 8766 (view B) by lengthening the bodice; this acted as the base. Using E6000 glue, I fastened sequinned trim, rhinestones, satin rosettes and fake pearls in what I can only describe as a Southern drag queen explosion. I made little cap sleeves with organza and a matching choker.
For the skirt, I followed some youtube videos on fishtail hems. Basically you get really heavy duty fishing line (I used 80 lbs) and sew it into the hem of an organza circle skirt. I made 8 circle skirts in total which is necessary for the “I’m an adorable little cupcake” vibe. I intended to use my baby hemming foot, but that was going to take way too long so I just folded the fabric over once and used a zigzag stitch close to the hem to catch the line. I sewed all the circle skirts together, sewed them to the hem of the bodice and covered all the stitches with some more sequinned trim. The skirt ended up VERY short so I had to wear some lacy bloomers underneath just in case.
Initially I was going to use my own hair so I could avoid the “Are you Honey Boo Boo?” question but in the end, I decided if you’re gonna go over the top you might as well end up on the other side of poor taste. Hence the wig, dollarstore tiara, 25 pounds of blue eyeshadow, tube of brown foundation and the gigantic fake eyelashes. I finished it off with some very tan dancer’s tights, pink rolled socks (I couldn’t find any ruffled ones in my size) and white pumps I turned into maryjanes with some rhinestone trim.
Than I went to our annual dance party and creeped out all my friends.
If anyone is wondering what the key is to this costume, it’s staying in character all night and making everyone really uncomfortable. Things got really weird when my friend Rachel showed up in what was more or less the exact same costume (total coincidence).
She is under 5′ tall so I think she won the “Who’s creepier contest”. It was a lovely night. I danced my butt off (no award, sadly) and was pretty heartbroken to take this dress off. Not really the kind of thing you can pull out for a special occasion….
Did anyone do anything this weekend? Are my New Yorker pals surviving the Halloween smiting storm? (I hope you stocked up on lots of batteries and mini candy bars).